remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
