i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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