The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
