Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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