so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
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