he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
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