New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
I'm passing your future prison.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
OPIZZABONMYDICK
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
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