This girl is more easily done than said...
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
