The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
