I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Randomize
