I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Randomize
