You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
