It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
