Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
