these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
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