Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize