Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
