Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Randomize
