Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
i just ordered a pitcher of margaritas for me and a friend but she called and canceled. oh well, looks like im getting trashed alone.
the waiter who hardly speaks english told me "i go get your medicine now"
this medicine is soooo good.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Edward fifth and chaser hands
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
