Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Randomize
