I am puke
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
