we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Randomize
