Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
