Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
