is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
