I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
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