Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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