I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
