I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
