scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
