I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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