he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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