You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
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