3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Randomize
