Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
