I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
