Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
