You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
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