I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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