Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
People with herpes should wear stickers.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
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