Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize
