i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
