I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
