She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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