sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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