Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Randomize
