I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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