It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Randomize
