There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
Randomize
