I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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