that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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