How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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